I was talking with a friend this week. We've known each other since elementary school so we've been through all of the stages of life from being kids, school, marriage, having kids, and all the issues that life takes us through. We're both believers, but, as most people know, things occur in life that makes one question God and why He allows bad things to happen to good people.
17 The Lord hears his people when they call to him for help. He rescues them from all their troubles. 18 The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed. 19 The righteous person faces many troubles, but the Lord comes to the rescue each time.
Psalm 34:17-19
I could tell you what my mother shared with me many, many years ago: "Life isn't fair", she said. In our household, my husband and I always joked that the fair came once a year in February, referencing the Florida State Fair in Tampa. But I think that Jesus said it best in John 16:33:
33 I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”
And while that might not bring you any peace, let me share something with you that happened to me.
In November 2022, while on vacation in Florida to spend Thanksgiving with my husband's family and to celebrate my darling father-in-law's 90th birthday, I started to feel really "weird". My head felt as if it was stuffed up really bad, a la sinus infection, my balance was off, my left fingertips were numb, and I couldn't think very well. These symptoms began suddenly. I was in the shower and fine and then I couldn't put my earrings in because my fingertips were numb on my left side.
I Googled the symptoms, and kind of knew that it was evidence of a stroke, but I put off going to the hospital for 36 hours until I lost my balance and fell. There I was, away from my home and my parents, inpatient in the hospital, and concerned that I could have permanent damage. I had a lot of time to sit and think. I could have chosen to feel defeated, hopeless, and disheartened and that wouldn't have solved a darned thing. It wouldn't have healed me, made me feel any better, or changed the situation.
In the quiet moments of those three days, I simply prayed. I asked God for healing and restoration but I also turned the whole situation over to Him. I chose to give Him my anxiety and fear. It was all I felt that I could do. It was the only control I had. I had zero control of my health and the situation and I felt that my best option was to turn it over to the One who did have control. And, the people that were caring for me were so supportive and loving. Almost as if God sent them there to comfort me and give me hope and encouragement.
I'm not going to tell you that I didn't cry, because I did. I'm not going to tell you that I don't get worried or scared today, but I don't despair. I really have to take control of those out-of-control thoughts at times.
5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:5
When I turned those fears, anxieties, and my unknown future to God, I had such a peace that came inside me. I know that I don't have control over my future but I know where my future is.
I was reminded of the chorus of the old Bill Gaither song, Because He Lives, as I was writing this post:
And because He lives I can face tomorrow. Because He lives all fear is gone. Because I know He holds the future, and life is worth the living just because He lives.
And I'll go all Hollywood on you with this quote from The Shawshank Redemption:
Get busy living or get busy dying.
Ain't nobody got time for fatalistic thinking, which I equate to dying. I want to keep on living and living a wonderful life and not a life of fear, anxiety, insecurities, and death. So, my hashtag for my healing has been #FailureIsNotAnOption. I came home, got into some neuro rehab, and I've had hardly any lasting deficits.
Here's how I strive in faith to live:
4 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. Philippians 4:4-9
So, the question of WHY ME? isn't really answered. But, perhaps it needs to be changed to WHY NOT. Romans 3 is pretty clear that we're all unrighteous (morally right, justifiable, virtuous)
10 As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one; 11 there is no one who understands; there is no one who seeks God. 12 All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one.
It's only through our faith in Jesus and by His death on the cross that we were redeemed (bought with a price by Jesus's death on the cross in our place).
22 This righteousness is given through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, 23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, 24 and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.
The short version of that is that none of us is worthy to be exempted from bad things happening in our life. Not the biggest church-attending person, preacher, volunteer, or donator. Unfortunately, like I told my friend, because of freewill, sin is in this world and we are all perpetrators and victims of sin, whether it be ours or someone else's.
And it's ok to be mad at God. He can handle your anger. Perhaps in the tears and crying out to Him, you'll hear Him speak to you or you'll feel His peace wash over you. I would challenge you to cry out to Him. Your anger isn't going to make him mad at you. Frankly, He already knows how you feel. Maybe He's just waiting for you to actually say it out loud to Him.
This went longer than I expected, so thank you for sticking with me this far. Like my friend I was talking with, I'm praying for you. Count on it. While I might not know who you are, I'm praying for the person reading this post and asking God to bring you that same peace that He brought me when I was laying in a hospital bed.
In the meantime, listen to the words of this song and hear what God did for you because of His love.
I'd love to hear from you. Leave me a message in the comments.